October 28, 2011

Halloween Costumes: Made With Love- Or Bought With Love?

When I was a kid, my mom lovingly hand made my Halloween costumes. I had a beautiful Snow White, and a super cute fancy mermaid. I also had a horribly not-flattering orange flapper dress (but I've forgiven her for that- I think she was getting tired).
That's not me- but that's the pattern she used.

To continue the tradition, I've made most of the Spawn's costumes. We've had an anglerfish (only one man knew what it was- God Bless you, random neighbor. He said it was the best costume he'd seen all night), a mermaid, a princess, a wizard and who knows what else. There have been a few random store bought costumes thrown in here and there- a spider witch, a pirate. Until last year, when the Spawn revolted. They all wanted store bought costumes. 

Wear your damn Spiderperson costumes while you break my heart.

I was a little sad. Just like when I was growing up, the grass was greener on the other side. All I ever wanted were those chintzy store bought costumes, while my mom was slaving over wonderful homemade costumes as a labor of love. And now my lousy ungrateful kids were repeating history. Shunning my creative, lovingly handcrafted creations for polyester crap from Wal-Mart.


This year I decided I would make or buy what anyone wanted. I got a request for one homemade Halloween witch, one chainsaw and one set of ninja swords. And now I'm thinking.....
Halloween is 3 days away and Spawn#2's witch costume is in 20 pieces. We're so busy and tired I can't even think about sewing it without getting a headache. Seriously, who gives a crap where a costume comes from? All the kids want is candy. 

When I asked Spawn#2 if we could go buy her a costume, she almost cried. Dammit.

Do you make or buy your costumes? And do you feel guilty over which you choose?

October 21, 2011


My loyal readers know that here at Not Blessed Mama, we take social issues very seriously. Just recently we had the One Million Moms Who Eat Balls initiative, which was a smashing success (thank you friends). Mothers Against Bare Shoulders also did quite well- if we have saved one girl from the torture of having to wear a tank top, then we've done our job. But we cannot be complacent! There are always new threats and attacks on our children. As mothers, we must always be vigilant and ready to answer a call to action. And I have one for you. 

This time it's Barbie. 

This is the face of evil. 

Yes, Barbie. Tokidoki Barbie. Have you ever seen a more sickening thing in your life? Look at her- covered in tattoos, with pink hair. And you haven't even seen it all yet...

Look at those clothes! And even her pet is atrocious- wearing a cactus costume. It makes me shiver with revulsion.

And the more I look at it.... the cuter I think it is. IT'S ADORABLE. I love it. I love her purse- I think I had one like it. I love her haircut- I've for sure had that bob, and pink hair on many occasions. But now we've got the internets and a bunch of parents saying they are worried their children will want tattoos when they are older. OH LORD NO, PLEASE NOT TATTOOS. ANYTHING BUT THAT!

Let me tell you something: I worry. I worry a lot. I wonder if my children will turn out to be well rounded, intelligent, caring human beings. I worry about them finding jobs, finding fufillment, finding happiness. I worry about them being healthy and safe. I worry about what the future will bring. But one thing I do not worry about is tattoos. If your children getting ink is a huge concern for you, then you need to re-think your priorities. 

And seriously, who doesn't have a tattoo these days? My parents have more than I do. We even have a family tattoo artist- and we're not some leather wearing, Harley riding freaks. Okay, my parents are, but I'm not. I'm just me. Little ol' Not Blessed Mama. Who never wants her daughter to have an eating disorder. Who never wants her sons to fight in a war. But does not, and will not ever, care if her children get tattoos.

Yup, that's me. 

By the way, this Barbie is $50 and a collector's item. My daughter will not be receiving this Barbie, but just because there's no way I'm wasting $5o on a Barbie that will wind up with its head missing and its clothes down the bathtub drain.

October 13, 2011

My (Weird) Baby

This is my baby. (My four-and-a-half year old baby.)

He's a mama's boy. He puts his little arms around my neck and hugs me and whispers, "I'll never let you go mom." Whenever he visits Grandma, he comes home and tells me how much he missed me. He wanted to marry me, until I had the nerve to tell him that boys couldn't marry their mamas. Boy was he pissed.

As much as I love this little guy- and my love stretches to the moon and back- this kid is WEIRD. He has a flair for the dramatic. He's always dressing up in assorted odd costumes. His latest accessory- well, I just have to show you. You'll be so jealous.

Why YES, that is a plastic Winco shopping bag. You see, Spawn#3 likes to tote his various treasures around, and he likes to do it in the most white trash way possible. And his collections..... they're interesting. (Although this one is missing the nails- I insisted on taking them away when we went to the park.)
 There are some normal kid things in there. Dollars, coins, markers. Sunglasses, candy.

And then you get to the weird stuff- Anbesol, a packet of Equal, a small cleaning brush, grape Laffy Taffy chapstick, Mucinex, a tablet of applications for the Home Depot Garden Club, a used Subway card.

And like I said, I took away the nails. He's also had vitamins, a single sock, sparklers (these seemed to alarm some of the people at a playdate, for some reason), and a million other things I can't remember. All lugged around in a flimsy plastic bag until it falls apart.

I tell you, I love that weird kid. He takes after his mother. 
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