Dear Santa, I've been nice! Can I have:
1. A manicure. Santa, have you seen my hands? They look like I dig trenches instead of raise children.
2. 18 hours of straight sleep. For some reason I am convinced that all life's problems would be solved if I just got to sleep for a day. Or two.
3. Meal delivery service. Do you have any idea how many more things I could get done in a day if I wasn't spending half of it in the kitchen?
4. A bathroom that doesn't smell like pee. Yes, I can have that now, but I'd like it without having to scrub the toilet. And the floor. And everything else.
5. Clothes with no stains on them. It's bad enough that the Spawn must go around town in clothes covered in dirt, paint and whatever else they get on themselves. Must Mama look like a bum too? That stupid homemade slime. Knew it was a bad idea.
6. A Roomba. What? Those things are cool!
7. A big ol' tricked out mini-van. Ok, I know this one is asking for a bit much... but Santa, I have been soooo good and I want a mini-van sooo bad! I have 3 kids! And you know how much crap they have- you've given them half of it, so I feel you are a little bit responsible here. I want one with a cooler in the floor for drinks and removable seats and DVD players and and and.... all that good stuff. Any color is fine.
I anxiously await your decision, and thank you for your consideration.
Love, Not Blessed Mama
